Dead

Li Huowang picked up the golden fry before him, holding it close to his eyes to examine it. Dusted with fine salt, it glowed amber in the morning light.

After studying it for a long moment, he dipped the fry in ketchup, stuffed it into his mouth. In an instant, sour, salty, crispy, fragrant—everything flooded his palate.

He followed it with a big gulp of iced Coke, cupping the cup with both hands, then bit hard into the hamburger. Milky-white cheese squeezed out from the corner of his lips and dripped onto his blue-and-white striped hospital gown.

“Son, eat slowly. If it’s not enough, I’ll buy you more.” Sun Xiaoqin wiped the cheese from his shirt with her finger and popped it into her own mouth.

After gently stroking the back of her son’s head, she stepped back and came to Yi Donglai, who was standing with a notepad. “Doctor, my son’s appetite is suddenly this good, and he isn’t saying crazy things anymore… Is he getting better?”

Yi Donglai watched Li Huowang wolfing down his food, brows tightly knit, and gave a slight shake of his head. “Sister Sun, please step out for now. I still need to observe.”

“Okay, okay, okay! I’ll go, then. You have to take a good look! If you can cure my son, I’ll kneel and give you a plaque if I have to!”

The door clicked shut. Yi Donglai walked slowly to Li Huowang’s bedside, pulled a stool over, and sat down. He spoke as if making small talk. “What happened to you? Did something set you off over there?”

Li Huowang ignored him. He finished the fast food on his tray, picked up the handheld console that was paused on the bedside table, and his fingers began to fly across the buttons. He looked utterly absorbed, as if his mind and body were completely submerged in the game.

“Zhuge Yuan is dead.”

SMACK!

The console, still blaring its BGM, smashed against the wall and shattered into pieces.

In an instant, Li Huowang was on top of Yi Donglai, his body pinned to the doctor, both hands gripping his sleeves in a death-claw. He howled, nearly out of his mind. “Do you want to die?! I can bite through the artery in your neck with just my teeth!”

Yi Donglai raised his right hand behind his back, halting the two guards who had rushed in from the door. “Li Huowang. You’re a good kid. You wouldn’t do something like that.”

“Good my ass!” Li Huowang slammed his forehead into Yi Donglai’s, knocking the doctor’s head back.

Yi Donglai touched his bleeding nose, then, undeterred, pulled a tissue from his white coat pocket and wiped it.

Li Huowang’s roar echoed through the ward. “Do you have any idea?! I’m really sick of it! I can’t take it anymore! Why does it have to be me?! Why am I the only one who has to live through this hell?!”

“I’m human too! I’m not made of iron! Not one good thing has ever happened to me over there! Over and over and over—I’m so tired of carrying it! I’ve had enough!”

Leaning against the wall, he stumbled toward the window. “I’m never going back to that chaotic, hopeless world. Never! It’s all fake! All of it is just a hallucination caused by my illness! Let it burn! Let it all die!”

“Yi Donglai! Write me a discharge note! I’m cured! I want to go back to school! I want to find Yang Na!”

But Yi Donglai adjusted his glasses and shook his head gently. “No, Li Huowang. Running away won’t work. You have to go back. The dragon vein of Great Liang still hasn’t been reconnected. That’s about the lives of countless people in Great Qi.”

Li Huowang turned around slowly, his eyes fixed on his attending physician. “You’re insane!”

Yi Donglai walked up beside him, looking out through the window at the other patients on their yard break. “Huowang, you know, some psychological illnesses are also closely tied to never daring to face things. No matter what you’re running from, running is useless. You have to be brave and face it.”

“Ha. Face it. Easy for you to say.”

Li Huowang’s eyes were bloodshot. He clenched his right hand over his own chest, his voice trembling. “You have no idea what I’ve been through. Put yourself in my shoes and see if you can still say that so lightly!”

“What about Bai Lingmiao? She’s alive or dead—don’t you care? And Li Sui. Didn’t you say she was your daughter? Look at how your mother treats you. Then look at how you treat Li Sui.”

At these words, Li Huowang’s features twisted. He grabbed the window bars and smashed his forehead against them with all his strength.

“Li Huowang! Calm down! Calm down!”

With the help of the guards, it took Yi Donglai a considerable struggle to wrestle Li Huowang—now bleeding from the head—back into a straitjacket, strap him to the bed, and push in a sedative.

Wiping the sweat from his brow, Yi Donglai spoke again. “Don’t lose heart. Life is nine parts out of ten disappointments. But since it’s already happened, we have to find a way through it.”

“If you run into more trouble over there and don’t know what to do, I can help you. And if there’s something I don’t know, I can look it up online for you.”

His head buzzing, Li Huowang stared slowly at Yi Donglai, forcing out one word at a time. “Is this your big idea? The one you talked about? Looking at it from my perspective? Do you really think that helps?”

Yi Donglai didn’t answer. Instead, he picked up another syringe and injected something into Li Huowang’s vein. “You’re under too much mental strain. You haven’t slept in two days. Just get a good rest now.”

As the cold liquid merged into his bloodstream, Li Huowang felt his vision darken, and gradually, he lost consciousness.

When Li Huowang woke again, he found himself lying on his back inside a well. His mouth tasted bitter and strange—he didn’t know what he had eaten.

The modern world didn’t have wells. He understood he was back. But he didn’t stand up right away. He just stared dully at the round patch of white above.

I’m back. Everything I didn’t want to face is back again.

He looked at the other hallucinations. Peng Longteng. The monk. Red Center Zuowandao. Qiu Chi Bao. Jin Shan Zhao. They were all still there.

Only Zhuge Yuan was missing.

— “Your name is Er Jiu, right? How strange. Your Five Phases—Fire and Metal are still there. But why are the remaining three gone?”

— “Until we meet again, Er Jiu. I am Zhuge Yuan. If you run into a problem you can’t solve, remember to come to Apricot Island in the West Sea to find me. Though my abilities are limited, I will help if I can.”

— “To know a person is precious in knowing their heart! There is no ‘why’ in life! If I wish to do something, then I do it! Siming reveals the world— STAND DOWN!!”

— “Because I have to save Great Qi!”

A long moment passed. Li Huowang shook his head hard, shaking the tears away. Reaching out, he grabbed the well rope and, with great effort, climbed out of the mouth of the well.

He wanted so badly to curse Zhuge Yuan. He even wanted to beat him senseless. He wanted to pour out all the dissatisfaction he felt toward him.

But he couldn’t. Because he was dead. And dead was dead.